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I Know a Girl


Written by – Miss Meza  (Miss Meza Profile/Bio:

I know a girl… she puts colors inside my world…

IK1This column is a lot of things. It’s a long time coming and yet hot off the presses. It’s both painful and cathartic, anxiety inducing and stress releasing. It makes my throat swell up and my heart as well.

Most of you will read the following words and not be shocked at all, a few of you may even have assumed. Trust me when I tell you that nothing I will say is “news” to us… but yet every word of it is fresh.

Candi was blessed with many treasures in life, I mean come on – we all want that hair!!  She also has fabulous olive skin, adorable freckles and dimples, a brain that almost literally absorbs anything, and a heart straight from heaven!

What she wasn’t blessed with was a sense of calm, a center, an inner quiet.

She wasn’t graced with balance or coordination, or any other outward skill. Mostly – Candi wasn’t granted the social abilities that make life more doable for some.

Candi was given some other gifts instead. They aren’t always perceived that way, and in truth many days I have a hard time wondering why one child would be granted so much. Many times her gifts overwhelm me, and not positively.

Her gifts come with fancy labels: ADHD, SPD, Dyspraxia, Irlens, and Autism.

They aren’t exactly what you wish for from Santa or for your birthday, but they are the gifts she has been given and we will now, as we always have, make the most of them.

It may seem silly to write this and leave it here. We have come to a point that the struggles are hard to bear alone, and it is easier to be open than to hide. We aren’t asking for sympathy or a medal or any type of kudos, honestly our egos don’t matter.

All we need is grace and understanding for this girl who would completely give someone the shirt off her back… except she doesn’t know how to understand what they need.

Her world is black and white, and truthfully – her outward impression is that she is very self-focused.

IK2She is. She doesn’t fully know how to be any other way. She wants friends, but has difficulty connecting, conversation is hard, interpreting social cues is nearly impossible, and understanding the nuances that drive friendships is unimaginable.

This is difficult to share, but Candi has approved it. She wants people to know that she just doesn’t know. We are working on that, but she (and we) hopes that this knowledge may help foster a little more patience and grace in others who are trying – or those who were frustrated in their attempts to try – to be her friend.

If you have questions or would like to know more about Candi’s gifts, I would be happy to elaborate, please ask.

You may even ask her, as she is now gaining a basic understanding of what each of these mean for her.


(Miss Meza ARCHIVES:        

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